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dnd-lore/Seighell/Joffrey's Diary/Session 9 (Notes).md
2026-03-29 22:09:06 +11:00

9.9 KiB
Raw Blame History

21/9/2025

Enemy ship has crashed into the basement *giant female space elves attack, 3 giant ones 8ft tall “for the empress”, one smaller one in the rear

Bubba: death by snu snu

autismus teleports down and targets first elfstarte with magic missile for 17

bubba attacks same one after hunters mark and misses with first attack, hits with second and does 25 dmg and then 18

Joffrey knows that elves are immune to charm coz fae ancestry, puts heat metal on middle elfstarte, does 8 dmg and they crit fail their save against disadvantage

elfstarte moves up, two by dyson and flapjack, one tangled up in fishing rod, attacking bubba

flapjack got missed, Dyson got hit, 8 dmg

smaller elf heals the tangled, injured elfstarte significantly

Autismus using big lightning staff lightning line attack, elfstarte succeeds save, elf mage fails, 28 dmg

bubba circles around and attacks mage/priest, hits, 6dmg + 9dmg

joffrey re-heats metal, does 13 dmg, they fail their save and have disadvantage again, drinks potion, gets back 8 hp

Joffrey yells at Dyson to do something, he uses his small breath attack on the elfstartes in front of him, didnt do much damage

hamsters squeak and seemingly flee onto the enemy ship

disadvantaged one leaves flapjack and starts attacking autismus, hit for 8, misses second attack. autismus hellish rebuke for 15 dmg

dyson being attacked again, they miss him

bubba gets attacked, hit by elfstarte, 5 dmg + 10 with glowing a revving

elf mage casts a spell, radiant fire rains down on bubba, 12 dmg after dex save

autismus burning hands his attacker and incinerates it

bubba attacks priestess again, does 8dmg + 8dmg

joffrey runs over to defend Dyson, thunderwave for 13 dmg, pushes their attacker back, moves up to body block Dyson, condescendingly says “dad do”

elfstarte rushes back and attacks Joffrey with 2 swords, misses first attack, hits with second 25 dmg, instantly downs him

priest attacks bubba with their morningstar, hits with first, misses second, does 16 dmg. bubba really low (11)

autismus circles and hits elfstarte and priestess with burning hands, 9dmg to both, priestess died, elfstarte looking bad.

bubba attacks his remaining elfstarte and does 6dmg + 9dmg, elfstarte on their last legs

elfstarte on joffrey downs dyson as well

elfstarte hits autismus with 1 of its attacks, 7dmg, hes on his last legs (5hp)

autismus casts burning hands on the weak elfstarte and just kills it; sorcery point to cast again on his bonus action, standing defensively over joffrey, casts burning hands again for 10 dmg

bubba considers stabilising joffrey but unloads instead after joffrey tells him not to; nat 20, does 14 dmg, attacks again, hits for 7dmg

last attacker misses bubba twice, luckily

autismus casts burning hands again, does 14, but attacker saves for half; uses last sorcery point to cast magic missile, fully tapped, kills it

bubba stabilises joffrey and autismus gets dyson

eerily quiet now

priest has regular morningstar on them, fancy chain armor; elfstartes have non-magical seeming swords, seems the glowing and revving were racial abilities

get 4x long swords off elfstartes

hamsters are off in the enemy ship

short rest + song of rest

go to see what hamsters are doing, waiting in the hole, we follow them in, pretty demolished, collapsed rooms etc, the death ray did huge damage

in the brig there is a goblin in a cage, doesnt look like one of squelchs tribe

covered in random bits of metal etc, cobbled together mad max armor, pots and pans

“hey youve found me, do you have the key ?”

no we dont, he doesnt know who has the key, says hes a tinkerer “slow bad”, the hamsters belong to him, his pets

we negotiate for his help, give him my socket set, sets himself free,

we explore everything, he thinks we can salvage a ballista but it will require dry dock to fix

dont want core parts, theyre illegal astral elf stuff and if were caught with them it will be bad

spelljammer is destroyed, joffrey asks if there are parts of value we could get and sell, maybe to pirates

says he knows where we could go, asks why were here, tell him about planet being destroyed, talks about knowing these ships had astral seeds on board

should go to “the rock” and see commodore crux

bubba gives him his rod and asks for help improving it, slow bad says he can make it better for astral fishing

joffrey suggests we dont muck around and get out of here; they dispose of hte corpses, patch the hole in the ship after dislodging the moth ship.

joffrey confronts flapjack after slow bad gives him directions etc, asks what happened and why they crashed, then shushes him and asks bubbaBubba rambles and implicates flapjack before admitted he knocked the stick

joffrey cuffs them both, after flapjack glared at bubba, bubba hits him as well

joffrey clones dysons research and gives his sword to the two engineers to make him a cane sword

bubba brews some potions and doles them out

autismus crafts some knuckledusters for flapjack

after a few days of warp travel arrive at an asteroid field, come around a big asteroid and see big snail shell thing, nautilloid

Joffrey carves a tally mark into the wall by the gem controls to indicate a kill

summon slowbad to the bridge and asks for advice on it, panics initially then says its a derelict, joffrey is animated at the thought of salvage, says they should investigate.

we ask the crew for information on the derelict, flapjack scans for life signs, doesnt really seem like it, faint life signs but that could the living ship itself.

joffrey knows some stories of illithids and knows they are powerful and eat brains, capture victims

ship seems to have been attacked by ballistas etc, some evidence of spell damage on the ship decks, might have been pirates, damage happened a while ago.

fly up to board the ship, lower decks are badly damaged and blocked up, only top decks are accessible.

Joffrey attempts “snake jazz”, succeeds, bubbas eyes roll up into his head and glow and momentarily it seems that another malevolent entity is looking out of his eyes and he loses control.

bubba has his fish bowl on his head full of water to breathe, they leave and land on the deck

autismus has a cod piece made from the elves underwear that hes breathing through

joffrey goes with them with SlowBad in tow to inspect for salvage

on the deck, not much around, some damage, ballista bolts stabbed into the deck etc,

big sphincter like doors, bubba starts punching it and it pops open, relaxes. besides them are some balls that seem they are meant to be used to open it

stairs leading up to higher platform inside, ornate chair, not like a spelljammer just a cool chair, captains area.

2 ballistas might be able to be salvaged, should look for the spelljammer throne, thats probably most valuable thing

joffrey wants to take the ornate chair to use as his captains seat on the bridge.

next to the chair on hte floor is a humanoid being, seems to be illithid, its headless

has a fancy breastplate with tentacle motifs etc, joffrey collects it +1 breastplate

spelljammer appears to have been removed, probably githyanki have attacked this ship, its what they dothere is a second corpse in the room, autismus checks it, it has a scroll, Wall of Force

bubba goes through pair of doors, finds some animal like things in cages, doesnt find anything much of value. he unlocks the door to the cages and rifles through the corpses. He finds some 26 gold, 126 silver and a red ruby ring

bubba needs to make an int save, succeeds, little brain with arms appears behind him and attacks, misseshe kills it

in a fight, autismus twists and pull to go through

2x corpses got up and attacked him, autismus flames them to death and now their heads have exploded and hostile brain creatures have come out, are attacking

joffrey having space coffee in the command throne, oblivious to whats going on

brain psychic attacks bubba for 10 dmg, reduces his int to 0 on a failed save, he falls to the ground unconscious

another brain psychic attacks autismus for 15 dmg, fails to beat his intelligence score and he isnt turned into a vegetable

joffrey hears then screaming for help, gets through the door, uses mage hand to operate the balls, met with the scene of bubba on the ground unconscious and autismus badly injured.

joffrey inspires himself, “my god” looks at a picture of himself in his locket casts thunderwave lv 2, 12 dmg to one, 6 to the other, theyre both still up

autismus magic missiles and kills one, injures the other

bubba int contest with int devourer, he fails, he gets back up, the int devourer has disappeared…its inside his head and has eaten his brain

his body gets up and attacks autismus, he misses him

autismus attacks him with magic missile

Joffrey does an insight check (successful) knows hes being controlled, plays snake jazz, succeeds, the int devourer is kicked out, his eyes start glowing and he seems stunned, mesmerised by the jazz

int devourer tries to attack bubba again, fails to inhabit him because of snake jazz defense and it has an aneurysm and dies.Joffrey continues playing snake jazz seeing him stunned, uses mage hand to sleight of hand the 26 gold from earlier off himloses 1 coin, autismus finds it on hte ground by his feet , coin has tentacle motif on it, lucky gold illithid coin

joffrey drops snake jazz and rushes to him, seems concerned for him says he was unconscious etc

autismus doesnt see joffrey take the money, finds coin and gives back to bubba, bubba refuses and says autismus saved his life

as theyre checking themselves etc, slowbad comes in and asks if its time to leave, he has removed the 2x ballistas and a psionic control gem

Autismus and joffrey collect some intellect devourer brain matter

joffrey has him remove the fancy illithid chair and coffee machine and they leave

6 hours out from the rock

Arrive at The Rock of Bral, giant asteroid city with many disticts and a port