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dnd-lore/Seighell/Joffrey's Diary/Session 6.md
2026-03-26 20:16:55 +11:00

16 KiB
Raw Blame History

31/5/2025 - Creative use of mechanicals

The bright, immaculate foyer faded from view, transitioning to a dimly lit, metal-clad room rife with corrosion and signs of wear.

Sputtering overhead lights intermittently cut through the gloom, occasionally joined by a shower of sparks from among the myriad exposed wires in the ceiling.

Small, red cabinets dotted around the perimeter of the space sat empty, their fire suppressants absent.

Gazing around, the troupe could see a glass wall to their right, covering another jungle of cables and pipes haphazardly routed in all directions.

Movement at the far end of the room drew their eyes to a nightmarish contraption, a chair of sorts covered in metal appendages, whirring and juddering. It appeared to be repairing a small, mechanical looking gnome, with one artificial eye that glowed softly.

Recovering from the rapid change of scenery, they became aware of rows of other miscellaneous small forms, standing sentinel on either side of the room.

Fortunately they all seemed to be dormant and Joffrey took a step forwards, thinking to engage them in conversation.Immediately, klaxons began to bombard the workshop, red lights flaring in the corners of the room, and all of the figures became alert, metallic faces snapping towards them.

"Fuck."

Thunder cracked, deafening even over the whine of the alarms, and three robots were rapidly disassembled, revealing the platinum rods and power crystals at their cores.Joffrey blew on his still-smoking hand in smug satisfaction, as Autismus contributed to the carnage, immolating another trio with a gout of flames.

Bubba flung a dart and whipped the slightly larger robot being repaired with his fishing rod, injuring it, as Squelch shattered another with his hammer.

The fighting quickly devolved into a brutal brawl; Bubba and Squelch both bobbed and weaved multiple opponents each and Joffrey soon took a wound from his own.

Bucking and shuddering, the repair apparatus went haywire and began to careen through the scrum, sharp implements a swirling vortex that took an unwary robot from its feet.

A masterwork dagger struggled dig deep enough to kill, firebolts slammed into targets to similar effect, whips cracked, but only the mighty Whack-Splat proved truly lethal.

The goblin was the next to be injured, although the crowd was beginning to thin and the fisherman kept another two busy, jumping over the prone assailant threatening his ankles.

With a horrendous screeching, the chair crashed into the wall, limbs scraping metal against metal over the head of the knee knifer, as it ponderously dragged itself along the surface. Tiefstein finally drove his dagger home, piercing the chromed cranium of his cantankerous cur, before bravely moving to cover the sorcerers flank, at the back of the room.

He piped a soothing melody, reminiscent of summers spent by a lake, buckets brimming with aquatic animals, to bolster the halflings resolve in his efforts with the furious furniture.

Buoyed by the confidence inspiring presence of his leader at his back, Autismus crushed another pair of cyborgs with magic missiles and injured a third.

Bubba also scored a mighty hit against the repair droid as Squelch smashed the last of the minor mechanicals.

Bladed limbs crashed into the reinforced door ineffectually as Joffrey took out his crossbow, blew the dust off it and fired it experimentally; he hadnt used it before and all he achieved was adding an additional dent to the door.

Another firebolt wafted over the perilous pinwheel, as Bubba spied its power source through its thrashing limbs and stuck his hand in, narrowly managing to rip it out.

Surveying the carnage, Joffrey sucked up 13 gemstones, 8 of which held a charge, as they examined the locked door.

Along the wall to either side of it, were 6 slots in total and it required a matching number of powered gems to activate it.

In a moment of brilliance, Tiefstein suggested using their combined mage hands and fishing rod to attempt to pull some gems out, and whip them through before it shut behind them.Unfortunately, their first attempt failed with the portal sealing closed, all 6 gems on the wrong side.

Scanning the new room they were now trapped in, they found it a hive of activity with five cubic machines whizzing around, continually repairing the structure and cleaning up.

In one corner was a pile of metallic plates that they were hastily securing to walls, along with a complex amalgam of ticking cogs that took all of their attention.

Similar to the previous space, there was a glass wall covering cables and other hazards along one side, however there was also a mass of cables that seemed infested with insects.

Looking closer, it became apparent that these were actually tiny machines bustling around and Joffrey endeavoured to capture some.

He took a proffered vial from the halfling, and employing his mage hand, attempted to scoop some of them up; which ended poorly.

They began to swarm like angry bees and descended on Bubba, although they didnt immediately penetrate his armour.

Slightly less fortunate, Autismus was ravaged by a second swarm and was grievously wounded, although the bard was quick to intervene and destroyed a number of them.

Likewise, Bubba was able to crush half of his while flailing around with his fishing rod.

The deranged lunatic threatened to set himself on fire, casting Firebolt on the tiny targets, while Squelch retreated after helplessly missing with his hammer, muttering a protective spell.

Their desire for diseased blood presently sated, Autismus' swarm descended on the bard, but glanced off his highly polished, leather cladding.

The 3 continued their desperate attempts to remove the insects without much success; eventually the fisherman managed to kill his.

Tangling with the last remaining swarm on Joffrey, Squelch missed and retreated back into the space the larger robots were operating in, panting.While his back was turned, the cubic mechanicals finally registered the presence of the newcomers and the tumult they were causing in their construction area. Eyes turning crimson, they barrelled into the group, two breaking off and attacking the goblin, while the remainder acquired one each.

Von Autingler and the paladin were caught off guard and took some hits, as Bubba savagely crushed his new opponent with a single strike and Joffrey laid about him with sword and dagger.

As a firebolt streaked past the bard and he frantically batted the swarm away from his vital areas, he realised this was his last chance to obtain a specimen before they were killed. Pulling his golden harmonica from his pocket, he attempted to play a sultry melody to insects, to coax them into a phial. Unfortunately, with the chaos around him and tiny claws carving furrows in his flesh, Tiefstein wasnt able to give the performance his all, and the lunatic finally succeeded in killing them.

The swamp dweller banished another of their foes as the fight devolved into a brutal melee with little progress being made on either side.

The tide turned as the deranged madman slew another, blasting it apart, damaging its gemstone heart.

Squelch was growing frustrated and smote his remaining robot, destroying it, as Joffrey precisely plunged his dagger and sword into the last of their number.

Rummaging around in the masses of sparking cables and twisted metal, they recovered a bevy of gems and platinum rods.

Approaching the door, they saw this one had only 4 slots and Tiefstein shrewdly proposed that they attempt the same trick theyd used previously. Now practiced, the trio managed near impossible timing, simultaneously removing 3 of the gems between their mage hands and fishing rod respectively.

They emerged into the next chamber laughing and high-fiving triumphantly, paying little heed to what lay beyond.Unnoticed were a trio of pyramidal repair bots, each holding javelin-like tools and another cubic robot, all performing tasks that were interrupted by this uproar.

Mirth subsiding, Joffrey turned towards the centre of the room, and was promptly impaled by a pair of projectiles that carried him from his feet, felling him in an instant.

Additional missiles flew past the others as they were alerted to the danger and the goblin rushed to his masters side, pouring divine energies into him.

Regaining his feet, javelins pushed from his now sealed wounds, the financier announced that he no longer hated the short nuisance, and turned to survey the apparatus in the middle of the chamber.

It was a conveyor belt of sorts, with a bright light shining upon it from one of a pair of flanking pillars, and a pair of shelves running the length of it on either side.

There was little time to make sense of this as the fisherman marked his first kill and Tiefstein charged to his aid, trading blows with a triangular terror; the goblin struggling to make sense of his statement.

The deviant made short work of the lone cuboid, meanwhile Joffrey was brutalised once again and was barely standing, internals pulped by repeated blunt force trauma.

Bubba tried his best to help but was able to offer little, one of the machines attempting to grapple him and drag him into the contraption, but he was too strong.

Pulling free he managed to land a good strike and yelled for Joffrey to retreat, but the bard growled that retreat was for cowards.

Roaring, his blades carved a deadly lattice in the air, savagely reducing his opponent to scrap metal, and he bore his now glowing sword aloft, declaring his supremacy. He had the power.

Speaking of cowards, the last robot grabbed the fisherman while he was distracted by this display of prowess and dragged him into the machinery.

As he was drawn along the belt and the bright light hit and almost stunned him, half the dust hed previously collected from the swarms reanimated, and began to ravage him.

The pyramidal mechanical was visibly repaired by the beam of energy as it followed him through it and began to walk backwards, to stay in its glow.

The diminutive dimwit clanked around to the side of the apparatus, studying the mechanism inside the glass covered shelves, spying a pair of scrolls.

To the bards dismay, the little lout attempted to smash the machine with his hammer, getting electrocuted for his trouble; He swore vengeance against any that would break it before hed used its power to charge his gems.

Tiefstein determined that the two scrolls were of mending and flying, bonking the glass experimentally. He decided he probably couldnt hit the robot anyway and lost focus on the brawl on the belt.

Autismus inspected the other side of the machine, but finding nothing of note, unsuccessfully attempted to drag the robot from the light; getting his hand slapped, he spat on metallic menace in frustration.

Bubba continued to kick and thrash at the swarm, reaching the end of the line and being dumped on the floor, as the goblin smote the robot.

Returning to the matter at hand, the bard now stood at the foot of the beam, agonising over dispensing his mineral collection into it. He realised it would take too long and instead, reluctantly took a pot shot at the insects with his crossbow, winging them.

The savage sorcerer incinerated most of those remaining, with the last few fleeing into the inner workings of the contraption.

The light was beginning to falter as they burrowed into its source and the bearer of the bag of holding desperately rummaged, trying to retrieve as many stones as he could before it failed.7 gems were empowered as the passed through it and Autismus leapt into it, his staff glowing with enhanced power, almost distracting him from the secondary glow in his trousers.Upon further scrutiny, he realised hed gained a second wish.

Before the scrolls from the now defunct device could be spirited away by Joffrey, he aggressively snatched those up as well, snarling at the bard.

Bubba suggested that they settle down for the night, noting that three rooms of frantic fights had left them in a sorry state.Joffrey was panicked and paranoid of possibly pausing, positing that the Tower would be alerted to their presence by now and may attack at any moment.Eventually they managed to calm him and they got some shut eye after hoovering up all the remaining valuables.

Fully restored and energising the door at the far end of the room, they made their way through but were interrupted from attempting their previously successful ritual.A scraping and clattering assaulted their ears as they noted the cybernetic starfish chained to the far wall, however the sound didnt originate from that strange creature.

The heaps of scrap metal and spare parts strewn about this apparent workshop began to swirl and collide, forming a growing mass, theyd seen something like this before on a smaller scale.

A giant metallic chimera formed from the debris, equal parts lion, dragon and goat, its three snarling heads malevolently surveying the quartet.

In a flurry of motion, the group fled back through the door, Bubba casting his darts and line over his shoulder, Squelch blessing the party and jabbering an oath as the two magic users lobbed spells.Joffrey, in a moment of calculated brilliance, had cast Heat Metal on the automata, its skin beginning to glow, joints seizing as it raged in pain, hindering it substantially.Sometimes his genius was so great, it generated its own gravity.

Bubba held the breach of the doorway, narrowly ducking a headbutt from the monstrosity, only to be raked by a massive clawed foot.Just as they were feeling somewhat safer for being on the other side of the narrow entrance, a torrent of dark green gas roiled through the gap, encompassing them.

The goblins hasty blessing was all that kept that from taking the full brunt of the poison, although the effects were still devastating.

Twin eruptions of fire wracked the beast as the bard and sorcerer rebuked it in unison, followed by yet another torrent of flames from the deranged madmans outstretched hands.

Despite their initial fear, the great mass of menacing metal was being beaten back, hunks of detritus clanging to the flagstones.

The dragon head whipped past in agony and the fisherman launched himself on top of it, seizing the glowing gem and tearing it out of the socket in its skull.

The great lizards visage slumped, thudding limp to the floor as he leapt clear of the remaining danger.

Tiefstein snapped his fingers and once again, the beasts metallic flesh glowed with renewed heat, eliciting another twinned roar of agony.

He followed this with a near impossible shot from his crossbow, perfectly carving through the maze of body parts to strike the crystal in the lions head.Unfortunately, it seemed the gods were against him and this failed to shatter or knock free the prism, merely further enrage its pedestal. Squelch and Autismus rushed the remaining heads, feeling their best chance was following Bubbas example.The diminutive greenskin failed to prise loose the gem from the goat head, while the deviant was successful in felling the lions with a rap of his staff, causing Joffrey to roll his eyes.

With two heads anchoring the construct, it was little challenge for the fishing enthusiast to pluck the remaining gem free, causing a sudden cascade of scrap as the creature lost cohesion.

As they gathered themselves, the bard sulkily tore the lone platinum rod from the heap that their strife had earned them.

Bubba approached the cybernetic starfish chained to the wall, answering its pitiful cries as it begged to be released from its torment.

As he reached for the lock, Tiefstein slapped his hands away and grilled the pathetic pentadactyl, shortly satisfied it was telling the truth and bore them no ill will.

It was called 57ev1e or “Stevie” and wanted nothing more than to return to its home on the plane of law and reconnect with its “Prime”.The troupe resolved to assist it, explaining that they had a means of navigating great distances in their magical lighthouse, and Bubba removed its chains.

They made their way to the glowing teleported in the corner of the chamber, the only means of egress, and the room warped around them.

In the time it took to blink and clear their eyes, they found themselves in a lavish office bedecked with fine bookshelves, leather couches and rich carpet. Opposite them was grand desk, behind which perched a well-dressed demon, peering at them perplexed.

To be continued.