dnd-lore/Seighell/Joffrey's Diary/Session 13 (Notes).md

7/02/2026

• Session opens in Toopla’s Tower and Toopla is telling us about an incredible and great captain called “Grimrod Garglinale” who is very handsome and is on a crusade against the Astral Elves.

• Toopla attempts to join the party on their journey, Joffrey is opposed to this but Autismus is compelled to allow her to come due to her great beauty.

• Eventually its agreed that she can come with the party and Joffrey attempts to manipulate her into bringing her 4x valuable Autognomes with her, in the hopes that he can financially gain from this situation.

• The party leaves Toopla’s Tower and arrives to find a debris field at the co-ordinates where Garglinale’s fleet was meant to be, seemingly the aftermath of a great battle.

• Two human Vampirates hiding in the wreckage climb onboard, called Dorgo and Vita.

• A tense standoff ensues and Commodore Crux wants to shoot them as they are Vampirates and have a bad reputation, but Joffrey and the rest of the group diffuse the situation and allow these 2 castaways to join the crew.

• One of the Vampirates is a swabbie and joins the maintenance crew, overseeing the cleaning autognomes; the other Vampirate is a lookout and replaces Vask, the semi-blind spiritual lizard man in the crow’s nest. Vask is tasked with assisting Bubba in his alchemy lab.

• They question the Vampirates about the battle and confirm that Garglinale’s fleet was ambushed by Astral Elves and defeated. Garglinale cast a spell on his ship, turning it invisible and was able to escape.

• The vampirate fleet was anchored in their home system and they aren’t sure how the Astral Elve’s were able to find them.

• Joffrey and Squelch question Toopla to see if she had any elves that came to see her recently and imply that she may have told someone where Garglinale’s fleet was hidden.

• She denies that anything like that happened and says that she has never met an astral elf; she’s distracted mid conversation by amorous thoughts of Garglinale.

• A debate ensues on whether or not they should explore the debris field and salvage some treasure as an electrical storm is brewing. Joffrey is very adamant that they should try and get some treasure and, among other plans, suggests firing someone out of a ballista to reach the derelicts quickly; Bubba finds this novel and exciting and loads himself into a ballista quietly while everyone is arguing.

• While everyone is continuing to argue, Joffrey casually activates the ballista, firing bubba at the debris, and he goes headfirst through the porthole of a derelict Astral Elf Space-Moth ship approx 500m away.

• While he’s searching the debris inside, he finds a pouch of 27 gold pieces, a potion of healing, a potion of climbing and a potion of Heroism.

• Now committed to staying in the area with Bubba overboard, the crew scramble to move the ship to collect him as the storm worsens and Crux is struck by purple space lightning, knocking him unconscious.

• The Spelljammer pilot driving their ship is called Dexa, who is a very wiry and unhealthy human female and they direct her to move the ship closer to where Bubba is.

• They learn that the name of their Gnomish engineer onboard that they have never met is Lilip.

• Bubba leaps back out of the derelict ship, using his Fish Suit to traverse the distance back to the crew’s ship; in the middle of his trip, he is struck by lightning, but in an unlikely turn of events, he catches it in a bottle.

• When the ship is close enough, Bubba uses his fishing rod to reel himself back in.

• When back on deck, he gives Joffrey the gold he found and Joffrey tries to give half back, but Bubba declines and says he doesn’t really care for gold; Joffrey beams and tells him he is like a favourite son to him.

• Joffrey reads his instruction manual for the disassembled Autognomes and realises there is a piece missing.

• Autismus talks to the Vampirates and they tell him that he smells of heroism; he casts detect thoughts on them and they are thinking that they like doing “heroism”.

• Autismus goes to mess hall hoping to have a drink with Toopla, but finds that she’s helping crux eat because he’s very injured after being struck by lightning.

• Using knowledge provided by the Vampirates, they locate and arrive at Captain Garglinale’s galleon “The Last Breath” and find that it is badly damaged after escaping from the battle earlier. True to his reputation, Garglinale is a very handsome Tiefling that is the spitting image of Joffrey, but has a scarred face, milky eye, hook for a hand, his animated severed hand is riding on his shoulder, and he has vampirate fangs.

• Crux staggers up on deck, still injured from the lightning, sees Garglinale and threatens to shoot him, frightened of a vampirate, and Joffrey slaps the pistol from his hand, exasperated.

• Garglinale questions them about why they are in this area, explains that he will need to rebuild his fleet after that loss to the astral elves and suggests that they join him.

• The party and Garglinale retire to the captain’s dining room to talk specifics.

• Garglinale asks about the Rock of Bral and Joffrey tells him it seems to be a hive of Astral Elves these days; he asks where else they could go and Crux tells him he should come with them to Doom Space to join the Griff armada. After a minor discussion, everyone agrees to head to Doom Space.

• Garglinale details that, to join with him, they would have to adhere to the vampirate code: 1. Don’t Eat Each Other, No crew member shall partake of the flesh or blood of another crew member 2. No Hymns, many crew member’s ears are sensitive to holy praise, while aboard the ships, bards and other musicians are allowed to play only secular tunes. 3. Cowards Consequence, those who abandon their post and shirk their duties shall be marooned. 4. No Shipboard Conflicts, all disputes shall be settled on land.

• The articles of the Vampirate code seemed agreeable and everyone was quite satisfied, but then Garglinale elaborated that they must also call him admiral and Joffrey balked at this.

• Garglinale has a charisma battle with Joffrey for Admiralty over the fleet that they hope to rebuild, Joffrey wins by rolling a nat 20.

• There is no love lost between them and Joffrey toasts Garglinale, breaking out his finest rum to honor him, especially as he looks like Joffrey, stoking his narcissism and racial pride for fellow Tieflings.

• After the party return to the deck, Mr Gibbons suddenly approaches Garglinale and appears to be possessed, tells him in a deep and foreign voice that his crew are betraying him and his ship is no longer his.

• The Last Breath takes off without him and the crew begin chasing it in their ship, The Second Wind.

• Joffrey has Gibbons thrown in the brig as a precaution even though he appears to return to normal.

• The party makes use of their various talents to attempt to catch up to the fleeing ship; Bubba uses survival to expertly trim sails and deploy flags to “catch the space wind”, Garglinale makes them invisible with a dark ritual involving an inscription on the deck, Joffrey plays Mariner’s Mambo on his flute, charming the Gravity Fish, reducing their gravity by 20% as the fish go to sleep and Autismus feeds the ship’s treant a heroism potion, juicing it up.

• They successfully catch up with the ship after a few hours of pursuit.

• Garglinale tells them that the enemy crew consistsof eight Vampirates, an ogre zombie, a Vampirate mage, and an annoying ghost. He also warns them that there is Alchemist’s Fire stored on his ship and they shouldn’t shoot at it.

• Squelch misty steps over and starts fighting their spelljammer pilot, a vampirate mage. He crit hits but somehow manage to do minimal damage with bad rolls.

• Autismus and bubba board through a hole in the back of the ship, attack and finish it; Joffrey boards, takes control of spelljammer throne and brings the ship to a halt.

• They have a brief aside with Garglinale and Joffrey asks about the cargo and if they can jettison the Alchemist’s Fire to allow them to fire upon the ship safely. Garglinale is very annoyed and adamant that they mustn’t shoot his ship, and also tells them that the Alchemist’s Fire is spread out throughout his ship so it can’t be easily jettisoned.

• Joffrey comments that not wanting his ship to explode, but rigging it to explode seems to be pretty poor planning.

• Enemy crew are aware of them and are breaking into the room as the party continues planning.

• A pitched battle ensues and the party works to hold the room where the Spelljammer throne is located to prevent the enemy crew from fleeing again.

• Squelch and Joffrey hold the Spelljammer throne room, while Autismus, Bubba and Garglinale climb out of the hole in the back of the ship and attempt to climb up on the deck and flank the enemy from behind; unfortunately they run into the ogre zombie and some Vampirates and are forced to fight them on their own.

• As each vampirate is killed, they explode into necrotic dust that deals necrotic damage, and while Squelch’s armour allows him to avoid most of their weapon damage, he is eventually knocked unconscious by repeated exposure to this dust.

• After shooting a Vampirate, causing it to explode and knock Squelch unconscious, Joffrey revives him and apologises for not noticing he was so injured.

• Autismus encounters the annoying ghost, who appears as a Tiefling and tries to possess him; Autismus ignores it, walking through it and proceeding the flank the remaining Vampirates.

• Eventually the crew and Garglinale successfully defeat the mutineers onboard The Last Breath.

• The annoying ghost of a tiefling re appears and attempts to possess Autismus but he is able to resist; it turns out that it manifests around a cursed golden amulet.

• Joffrey covets the amulet and tries desperately to come up with an alternative to destroying it, suggesting exorcising it, or storing it in the Bag of Holding that would technically keep it on another plane of existence.

• Unfortunately there doesn’t appear to be another solution and Squelch Divine Smites it, exorcising the ghost, causing the golden amulet to crumble to worthless dust.

• Captain Garglinale finally reveals his “secret weapon” that he had in the cargo hold and the reason why he was so adamant that they not damage his ship; the unconscious Astral Elf Princess “Xedali”, daughter of Emperor Xavian of Zoraxian.

• He says that he has been unable to revive her and Joffrey uses his healing magic to bring her back to consciousness.

• They realise that all the other elves they’d met had been referring to an “empress” and that they must be embroiled in a civil war between the two factions.